And don’t say you do because you don’t. 

You’re not the one whose Mother abandoned you at the age of 7. You’re not the one who had to witness their parents fight. I mean physically fight. Pots, pans and knives, stains of blood everywhere, Hair lying about, Shattered glass. You may have witnessed those scenes on tv, but there is no substitute to being there firsthand. Violent crimes committed in front of my very eyes at such a young age. I never understood and I still don’t. To people who supposedly love each other come to this? Divorce. When your parents divorce they don’t just split up, you do too. But this you don’t understand either. You’ll just say “Oh, i’m sorry; I didn’t know” like I’m a cancer patient but you don’t know what the fuck it is you’re saying. Sorry for what? Find the right words next time you talk to me. Please because with every wrong word you make ourself more to blame for my potential suicide. 

You’re not the one who used to cut.. for 4 years. You heard of those people. And those same people act like everything fine. “Lol, I do it for fun” we say “It doesn’t even hurt”. Of course it doesn’t hurt. We'e done it so many times we’ve finally grown accustomed to the feeling. No that’s not you. You’re not the nerd who used to get Straight A’s. One of the smartest in the grade perhaps, who would have graduated with honors and flying colors. Who got teased for her intelligence, who had to result in learning things to distract others from her brain power. Photogoraphy, editing, singing, dancing, music, sports. You think one of the smartest people was meant to leave the science books and Math books for things like that? No, she was made for greater things but you wouldn’t understand. You’re not the one who got expelled. No that can never be you. But the story is funny when it happens to someone else. Did you not hear the injutice in the story. Do you not feel the same rage? Nah, you don’t care. Your friend is just an expelee. it’s okay.

Here’s a good one - try and relate. You’re not the one who has been struggling with MDD for most of your life. Your mother pretends she doesn’t know about it and your father medicates you against your will. You’re not the one who can’t get the help she deserves because of the fucking country you live in. You’re not the one who feels like a fucking mental patient and feels the need to be isolated from people and all social activity. You’re not the one the doctors are worried about, giving you extra medication because you’re showing signs that you may worsen. You’re not the one who has to hide this fact just to be normal, just because you feel you need to be treated equally. 

You’re not the one who cares. THAT CAN NEVER BE YOU. You can play the part of the person that does, you can even feel for those things you’re supposed to feel for but you can never be the one who cares. You can’t be the one who cares so much they’re afraid of the wrong that might happen to others. You can’t be the one to care about others success above your own. You can’t be the one to care about your grades so much you cry every time you see them. You’re not the one whose so disappointed with yourself you find your reason to live in others instead. You’re not the one who depends on others happiness to make things better, to maybe give you hope. You can’t be the one ho cares for the world. You an be the one to represent it but in the end you’ll die and you don’t care to save the earth from its fate. You don’t see aall the negativity.

You don’t get teased for your humanity. You’re not the one who writes down your thoughts and then hears that someone’s talking about it as if it were their right. You get to post a picture of yourself without people saying you’ve posted “revealing photos” of yourself. You’re not the one who feels and then gets a whole load of beef for feeling. You’re not the one surrounded by inconsiderate bitches. You’re not the one who’s looked at like she’s a nut-case but faked a smile anyhow. You’re not the one at the other end of the falseness. You’re not the one who has to deal with a life you don’t and haven’t wanted for so long.

You’re not the one who has to see all the people you hate post things, such as humane quotes, when you’ve been teased for posting the same thing AND MEANING IT. You’re not the one who has to ask herself whether o not those people even have a heart to be posting such shit. You’re not the one who’s safe haven has been compromised. You’re not the one who has to go back into hiding. You’re not the one who has to see how fake people are as they insult you for copying you. You’re not the victim.

No you’re not me. But what if you were? You still wouldn’t understand.